Asymmetric Military

If you've never been in a military classroom, you've never experienced that delicate combination of boredom and fear perfected by the United States military over 232 years.

Those classes would torture any normal human (Where's the ACLU when you need them?), but for somebody suffering from a severe, non-diagnosed (not that they'd care) case of attention deficit syndrome, like myself, Army engineering classes required a mental gymnasticism worthy of Shawn Johnson to keep me from passing out.

Like I couldn't do that.

Anyways, one day the Army made the mistake of handing out something semi-interesting, this "Smart Card," written first for the Marines and then used by the Army (the Navy one included the phrase, "Hey..." OK, no Navy jokes.) and called the "Guide for Cultural Awareness." I took it out at around the 100th power point slide of one particular lecture and read it for the rest of the day.

It was fun. During breaks, I'd put together phrases and say them to the Arabic-speaking students from Egypt and Saudi Arabia, Aala kay-fek, in-baT-ah, "Calm down and lie on your stomach" (Army humor isn't very sophisticated.). I think it's unclassified. If it's not, I'll find out soon, I suppose. You can download it here. or just scroll down.

I too have reservations of associating religion and war, but I like both the song and vintage WWII film footage, and we have them both here in one convenient package.

The video reminds me that I'm of the last generation to personally know WWII veterans in any great numbers. One of them was my neighbor, Kenny Pringle. He and his wife were good people to dedicate so much of their time to me (I was as annoying as a pre-adolescent as I am now.) before they moved away to Arizona. He had a little workshop where he'd make me pet rocks and stuff. He'd tell me about his time in the Navy and recommend that great inter-generational bonding experience, fishing.

I also remember him chastising me for suggesting that fighting in a war was "fun." Anyways, God bless you, Kenneth Pringle.

To my brothers and sisters in the armed forces,

No doubt you've felt very proud today as friends, family, and others have thanked you for your service. I myself am very appreciative of the gratitude I've received. One thought that occurred to me is that one so honored must take special care to deserve it. Without getting specific, it's important for people in uniform to conduct themselves, both on and off the battlefield, in a manner meriting of praise.

That's all. Carry on.

2LT Guirado

The men and women of Class 04-07. Taken in April of 2007

From ROTC, West Point, or OCS and through an unpleasant interlude called BOLC, future lieutenants acquire skills common to all Army officers. Afterwards, new LTs move on to courses specific to their branch of which I just finished the one for Engineers called, Engineer Basic Officer Leadership Course (EBOLC, formerly EOBC)

During the three months I spent with class 0407 Bravo CO., 554 EN BN on Ft. Leonard Wood in Missouri, I learned how to: build and destroy bridges and buildings; enable our Army to move from one place to their objective while preventing the enemy from doing the same; read maps; and other things that facilitate the winning of wars.

As much as I enjoyed or disliked the above subjects, the most interesting and personally satisfying lessons didn’t appear on the schedule.

How the Army builds understanding:

The Army offers one the opportunity to meet people from every state in our fair nation as well as our brothers and sisters from around the world. Before the Army, I'd never really talked to people who hunted or watched NASCAR, and I was able to interact with fellow officers from Egypt, Turkey, Hungary, Saudi Arabia, and Congo, a particularly enlightening experience.

How the Army builds solidarity:

The Army forced me to learn how to live with people of sometimes profoundly divergent temperament and points of view. Working with my fellow soldiers during the day and some nights, socializing with them after work, and, at times, occupying the same room together, creates interpersonal stresses, as you might imagine, but it also forces one to develop strategies to either avoid or confront those problems.

How the Army builds the self:

Lastly, the Army taught me about myself. As I honestly reflected upon my performance in all of the above tasks, I was better able to ascertain my strengths, and, more significantly, my weaknesses; those things of which I’m capable and those which would be better left to others.

What the Army means to you:

For the civilian, I’d like to assure you that you can be proud of the men and women who serve in your Army. Taking into account the whole person: physical, intellectual, and moral; you’d be hard pressed to find a finer group of Americans than the American Army officer corps.

My friend Sharif from Egypt and Naif from Saudi Arabia at a reception. Once again, we have the ugliest uniforms amongst all militaries.

From four different commissioning sources- ROTC for those attending a civilian university; the Military Academy (West Point); OCS which provides a path to the officer corps for enlisted soldiers; and "direct commission," a "fast track" officer spring traditionally reserved for entering doctors and lawyers as it allows selectees to forgo some officer training, but, because of an officer shortage, not an uncommon officer starting place in 2007- all new officers converge onto either Ft. Sill or Ft. Benning for what's called BOLC II (BOLC I is OCS), a kind of combat basics course. After BOLC II, officers disperse again to the schools for their respective branch which the Army calls, BOLC III.

After BOLC 3, most newly minted LTs go on to become Platoon Leaders or "PLs." A platoon has around 40 soldiers and can be further broken down into squads (which themselves can be divided into teams). Several platoons make up a company and it goes up from there through battalion, brigade, division, and all the way up to corps.

Anyways, the job being important, the training can be intense at times. This song lovingly satirizes some of the teaching techniques employed by those who train lieutenants. I'd like to warn you that it has some rough language so, if that offends you, skip to another post.

Lieutenant Dan from Forrest Gump was a platoon leader.

From SoundsofSWC.

I have to go do Army stuff today through Saturday. Feel free to enjoy what I've done so far. Next week, I plan on working hard to develop some good posts.

I want all of you to read Asymmetric today. Is that clear?