Funnimetric

Encouraged by the success of her first hundred hours, Nancy Pelosi has released her agenda for the next hundred. They include:

1. Narrowing racial disparities in the sport of fencing.

2. Body armor for every man, woman, and child in America.

3. Free and compulsory grad school.

4. Windfall profit tax on iPods and bebe t-shirts.

5. Extending the fairness doctrine to the dinner table by having college professors participate in conference calls.

6. Limiting the pay of corporate executives to 99% of Nancy Pelosi's income.

7. Michael Moore international airport.

8. Mandate gender-neutral pegs in Milton Bradley's Game of Life.

Wait 'till hours 201-300.