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Liberal Group Demands That Scooter Libby be Freed After He Writes Children's Book
06/13/07
Two recently published children’s books written by Scooter Libby, former chief of staff to Vice-president Chaney who’s sentenced to serve two years in federal prison for not covering up a crime that he didn’t commit, prompted thousands of Liberals to gather in front of the White house and demand that President Bush pardon Libby.
"I don’t why a beautiful person like Scooter Libby is in prison while others are free to roam the streets, selling gasoline and trans fats," said Ed Asner, spokes sentient being for the group.
In the first book, Heather Has Two Socially Conscious Parents, an ideal family made up of star football player Heather; her mother, an ACLU attorney; and Heather’s stay at home dad struggle against bigotry and ignorance. The evening after Heather mentions, in class, that she thinks the presence of dinosaur bones proves that the Earth is millions of years old, a fundamentalist mob rouses Heather and her family from their home, pelts them with leather Bible covers and snakes, and attempts to burn them and their books. The mother saves the family by giving an impassioned speech against hatred and intolerance.
Libby’s second book is a cautionary tale called If We Don’t Sign the Kyoto Accords, We’ll All Die and Penguins Won’t Have Any Place to Live. In IWDSTKAWADAPWHAPTL, undocumented teenage sleuth Teresa Fulana decides to hunt down the killers of a group of scientists on the verge of perfecting a form of renewable energy derived from Love. When she follows a suspicious group of Neocons to their secret lair, she discovers that they plan to have the president illegally (the book gives all of the relevant articles from The International Law Book in a rather extensive appendix) declare war on every peaceful Middle Eastern country and steal their oil. After bribing politicians to reject an increase in CAFÉ standards, the Neocons would then have arranged to increase Greenhouse gases and leave on a spaceship hours before the planet exploded from the heat.
Knowing that she shouldn’t act unilaterally, Teresa breaks out some freedom fighters from a secret prison who, in turn, blow up the Neocon lair by selflessly martyring themselves.
President Bush is said to be seriously considering the group’s demands.
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