Asymmetric Music

"This isn't the Democratic party of our fathers and grandfathers. This is the party of Woodstock hippies. I was at Woodstock — I built the stage. And when everything fell apart, and people were fighting for peanut-butter sandwiches, it was the National Guard who came in and saved the same people who were protesting them. So when Hillary Clinton a few years ago wanted to build a Woodstock memorial, I said it should be a statue of a National Guardsman feeding a crying hippie."-John Ratzenberger.

Yesterday, I assembled some Rock and Roll songs that trumpeted conservative values. Today, I'm doing my far left* brothers and sisters a favor by compiling a list to encourage them as they seek to change America for the better:

1. Sign of the Times, Donna Fargo.

Podcast

Donna Fargo Winners by Donna Fargo

The Best of Donna Fargo: 20th Century Masters - The Millennium Collection

In this song, Donna sings of the American dream turning into a "nightmare." 1863? 1933? 1942? No, the year we'd all like to forget, 1986. Apparently, Donna had access to some detailed census data, as she concluded that Jews suffered proportionately. Unemployment was at 50%?

2. Cortez the Killer, Neil Young.

Proving that extremism begs for an opposite, "noble savagery" is an attempt by Europeans to reverse European feelings of superiority over the people whose land they colonized. The problem with those who take the noble savage route, is that, in their desire to make amends, they often lie, distort, or, like Neil Young, just say stupid stuff.

The Cortez in the song is Hernan Cortez, Spanish conquistador. Why sing about Cortez and not, say, other conquests in history like in everywhere else in the world since the beginning of humanity? Because Cortez was white and the Aztecs weren't, I guess.

If you know anything about Aztec civilization, you know how ridiculous this is:

And the women all were beautiful
And the men stood straight and strong
They offered life in sacrifice
So that others could go on.

Hate was just a legend
And war was never known
The people worked together
And they lifted many stones.

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Crime against humanity.

I love coffee. My first-ever drink from a cup was coffee. I drank cafe on leche every morning (how's that for parenting?)

After eating, I always ask for a coffee to go. It keeps me busy in between texting and browsing the internet while I'm driving (just kidding- very dangerous- don't do it).

Anyways, about half the restaurants don't have the kind of lid that you can keep on as you sip your coffee. I really dislike having to take out my Leatherman to open a slit in the plastic containers designed for soda.

This rule doesn't discriminate, from the most expensive restaurants to the mom and pop meat loaf dives, it's always 50%. Considering that many people probably finish their meal with coffee and a large percentage of them probably like to do as I do, and that coffee lids are available at Sam's Club or Costco for about 40 cents a ton; there's really no excuse not to have them. Please, coffee addicts, forward this post to your favorite restaurant:

Restaurants: Do this for us. Please. It's a small thing that brings many of your customers great joy.

Anyways, I decided to do a search through my massive mp3 collection for coffee songs. Here's what I came up with:

First, always, when possible, is Bach. His Coffee Cantata- BWV 211 is one of his best. I don't know German, but I'd probably laugh if I could understand it, as the lyrics are one of those wonderful Enlightenment topics, the silly peccadilloes of the modern and wealthy (Rape of the Lock by Bach's contemporary, Alexander Pope, is another one). Here, a young girl is addicted to coffee. I like to watch Classical performances, don't you?

The next song is by Otis Redding who alternates with Sam Cooke, Al Green, and maybe one or two others as my favorite Soul singer and is one of my favorite singers of any genre. He lays down his naturally gruff, yet expressive and melismatic voice to the service of "Cigarettes and Coffee." Otis Redding passed away (RIP) before health studies. It's the podcast.

This one was tough. Both the Andrew Sisters and Frank Sinatra sang what is probably the greatest musical indictment of nations relying on one resource for its income, "The Coffee Song." Addendum: First Bach, then Frank.

Probably the greatest R&B compilation is the 15-disc set, The Chess Story. It has the Muddy, Chuck, Bo, and Willie you're all familiar with plus some of the most marvelous music you've never heard, like this song from a Mr. Danny Overbea, "Forty Cups of Coffee."

The Putumayo collections are hit or miss. Many of the songs are middling, if unusual and fresh, but the collections often have one or two songs that make their purchases worthwhile. Such is "Soltarlo" by Claudia Gomez, recompiled by Putumayo on Music from the Coffee Lands.

I'll do Caribbean/Cuban cafe songs tomorrow.

Like Percy Sledge sings in the podcast, men will give up their money, job, and the respect of their children and the community to surrender to their lust. Mel Gibson, a man I formerly admired for his counter-cultural bravery, is the latest to fall into this trap. He either gave up his most deeply held Catholic beliefs or is seriously lying to himself. Do his kids take him seriously now that he's just another aging star with a hot chick half his age?

Before him, we had Mark Sanford's shameful display, Eliot Spitzer's foray into into the mutual degradation of prostitution, and countless other examples.

How much damage have a few priests caused the institution they dedicated their life to? Why did Michael Jackson risk going to jail for his attachment to boys? Really, could there be a scarier thought for Michael than being in jail. He'd last as long as a carton of Marlboros.

Besides direct harm, there's a harm of omission. Harnessing sexual energy and focusing it on either your spouse or another, productive activity is one of the bases of civilization. It's the reason we have bridges instead of endless hula huts and went to the moon instead of just the hot spring next to the river. Imagine if Eliot Spitzer used his money and time to help people instead of perusing brothel catalogs. Even looking at computer gadgets (almost done and its on to CNET!) is more ennobling than finding looking at some girl on a webcam.

I knew a guy who'd have a collection worth a million bucks now if he spent his time collecting coins instead of porn tapes.

It's one of our challenges as men.**

**I don't recall any famous lady politicians sacrificing their career for a Capitol Hill intern or launching a a thousand ships over some Trojan boy-toy. A few teachers seduce their students, but it's a rare thing. I guess women have their own things to worry about.

Classic soul: Churchy singing; horns; solid, steady, unadorned beat. James Carr was one of those second-tier soulmen, which means slightly below Redding but still great, with a handful of first-tier songs. Amongst those are "Pouring Water on a Drowning Man" in which a already-hurt man begs for mercy while a woman piles on the misery.

Anyways, it kind of reminded me of the way that Barack Obama is handling the recession.

You Got My Mind Messed Up is one of the finest Soul records, in the Otis Blue range. "Dark End of the Street" is probably his most famous single.

You Got My Mind Messed Up by James Carr

Proving once again that being an artist, especially a Rock star, is no guarantor of personal virtue, Phil Spector was convicted of second degree murder for killing actress Lana Clarkson.

Phil Spector is a Rock and Roll legend, having been involved in a series of early sixties girl group songs as well as having collaborated with the Righteous Brothers and the Beatles. According to Wikipedia, Cuban and Caribbean music was a big influence.

Phil Spector's famous for his "wall of sound" technique which means, to me, that there's a lot of instruments and you can't quite tell what they are.

The most prescient song is "He Hit Me and it Felt Like a Kiss" (above).

Ronnie Spector of the hyper-cleverly named group, the Ronettes, was his suffering, secluded wife. "Be My Baby" is the Ronettes' best song.

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Like many in my generation, Mr. T had a profound impact on my personal development. His pithy wisdom, encapsulated in the phrase "I pity the fool," both cautioned me against foolish excess and inspired me (to ride around the country as outlaws saving beautiful women from small-town thugs).**

The A-Team Complete Series (Seasons 1-5)

Anyways, in college (thanks B.A.), I became immersed in Blues and Soul music, and it wasn't long before I discovered Bobby Bland, probably the best pure Blues singer and one of the best Soul (and thus, from any genre) singers in history. An amazing fact about Bobby "Blues" Bland was that he lost the upper register of his voice, a powerful falsetto, early in his career, but his voice was so good that he still became the most popular Blues performer of his generation.

"I Pity the Fool," is the podcast. If modern R&B were half as good as this song, I'd still listen.

The Anthology

Oh, I forgot why I mentioned Mr. T in the first place. Hugh Hewitt talked about a new iPhone app on his show called "iPity" that mimics Mr. T. It's a legacy we should all promote.

**In fact, Brian Rivas, Javier Calderon, Tom Patel and I each adopted characters from the show (I was "Face," for no particular reason) and would play "A Team." Ahhh, good times.

I'll walk a few steps from the Blues, brushing up against the Rolling Stones on my way, to reach Led Zeppelin. Expand the radius a little further to say, Black Sabbath, and I begin to feel a little trepidation. I won't venture farther than that.

In other words, Led Zeppelin is as far as you can take basic Blues/Rock and Roll and still have it be listenable. Led Zeppelin has melodies, rhythm, singing- you know, it's musical.

Many of you are aware that Blues artists like Willie Dixon influenced Led Zeppelin, who remade blues songs like "when the Levee Breaks" done by artists like Magic Slim. Well, I've got a couple more for you. Nobody, to my knowledge, has made the following connections.

And no, I'm not one of those, "He ripped off..." guys either. It's ridiculous to be so (see this squid, "Oh my God! Led Zeppelin did remakes!), as very few musicians create in a vacuum.

"I Wish You Would" by Billy Boy Arnold is in the podcast (to which you should subscribe) above. I think the resemblance of Arnold's harmonica part at the end of the bridge to Led Zeppelin's "The Immigrant Song" is pretty obvious.

Vee Jay: 50th Anniversary

Led Zeppelin, "Immigrant Song"

Led Zeppelin III

This next one is a bit of a stretch. If you go to the middle of the Cuban song "El Palo de Anon," you'll notice the same whistle that you hear in "Fool in the Rain" from In Through the Out Door. This Led Zeppelin song is kind of Latin-sounding, anyways. Heck, Robert Plant's voice almost son montuno-s halfway through.

La Explosion del Momento!

In Through the Out Door

If you like this kind of stuff, these albums may interest you:

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He could have any woman in the world and marries somebody beautiful. She, any man and marries somebody rich. Each followed the natural inclination of his and her respective sex, which gives their marriage an advantage, I think. I'm sure that their child, Valentina, will appreciate their commitment to tradition. Al Green and I wish them a lifetime of "love and happiness."

The Love Songs Collection

Songs to leave off your playlist on Valentine's day:

1. All Right Now, Free. The most unromantic song on earth. Co** rock at its most base. Summary: Veni, vidi, vici.

More, and videos below

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The musical starts at Obama's birth:

But, fast-forwards to the 2004 Democratic convention. The song above, "Could it be I'm Falling in Love" by the Spinners (below), contemplates those still-not-fully-developed feelings.

A One of a Kind Love Affair: The Anthology

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