Movie and Television Reviews

I suppose I should have viewed the Emmys last night, being a entertainment blogger and all. However, I'm afraid I'll have to disappoint my tens of fans by stating that I just couldn't bring myself to watch it last night. It wasn't a conservative's "shut up and sing" aversion to the PC atmosphere characteristic of award shows; if anything, that makes them a little more interesting. I certainly don't hate entertainers; I'd be thrilled to meet many of them and am certain that they populate the gamut of human goodness and intelligence in the same proportions as teachers and soldiers.

However, just like I appreciate indoor plumbing but don't watch Plumbing Tonight on the P channel. I love the end result of entertainers' products, but don't otherwise find actors compelling. Take away their beauty and their ability to shed a tear on queue, and you have, well, everybody else.

Follow up:

So, it makes sense that I wouldn't watch the conveyor belt of in-jokes, industry intra-praise, and self-important statements that make up Oscar and Emmy programming.

But, 13 million people did watch it. From my research,

Clothes:

You'd be shocked to learn that I don't know a heck of a lot about clothes. Having read fashion criticism, I could fake it and say, "Lisa Rinna looked dazzling in this sexy strapless number. And white was bold choice," but I'll leave such poignant remarks to the experts. I will show the picture, however.

Awards Themselves:

The only two current shows I watch are the Sopranos and Lost. Terry O'Quinn won for Lost and Sopranos deservedly won best drama. Both shows are true artistic achievements and run neck to neck in the "best television show ever" sweepstakes.

Terry O'Quinn in his non-islandware

Battlestar Galactica won for best visual effects. The effects were great this season, although the show's other aspects declined precipitously.

Politics:

Al Gore won something. I can't comment on his show because, like most Emmy voters and 99% of the public, I didn't see his Current TV channel.

David Chase offered this lovely statement:

"In essence, this is a story about a gangster," show creator David Chase said. "And gangsters are out there taking their kids to college, and taking their kids to school, and putting food on their table.

"And, hell, let's face it, if the world and this nation was run by gangsters" — Chase paused and shrugged, as the audience laughed — "maybe it is."

Way to bring America together, David.

And Kathy Griffin, whom I never heard of, sensitively uttered:

"A lot of people came up here to thank Jesus for this award. I want you to know that no one had less to do with this award than Jesus. This award is my God now!"

Nobody made similar comments about Islam or Buddhism.

And then there's Sally Field who wasn't just offensive to men (as if we care) and the religious ("goddam"), but very dumb and naive:

“And, let’s face it, if the mothers ruled the (world), there would be no goddam wars in the first place.”

It's a shame, too, because her praise of mothers immediately preceding her idiocy was very touching.

Ray Romano and Katherine Heigl also went for the cuss words. I wonder if they say those things at the Insurance Salesman awards?