Movie and Television Reviews

Terminator: Salvation is both profound and profoundly silly- in an entertaining way.

In this Terminator installment, Marcus Wright (Sam Worthington) is a robot-human hybrid (not unlike Al Gore) who comes in contact with an unofficial part of the human resistance movement, Kyle Reese who has yet to realize his importance in the the human salvation plan.

There's conflict between Connor and Marcus, as Connor's "naturally" reluctant to include a robot in his unit. Having been saved by Marcus from some surviving rednecks (surely subsisting on "survivor seeds") and intuiting something human about him, Blair Williams (Moon Bloodgood), who's a ringer for Sarah Connor Chronicles' Jesse Flores (Stephanie Jacobsen), busts Marcus out of human jail.

Marcus and Connor then head over to Skynet headquarters, prison, and grill to bust out captured Reese.

TS is a very clean production, with a straightforward story line, great special effects, and good acting. The robots are scary. I liked it better than Star Trek.

TS grabs a little profundity by dealing with a fundamental question: what makes humans, humans and why are they valuable? Unlike Battlestar Galactica, TS doesn't linger one meter below the depth at which it functions comfortably or, the philosophizing doesn't drag down the basic military story.

I liked the references to the previous Terminator movies. I would have liked a little more connection to the excellent Sarah Connor Chronicles. Perhaps Cameron Phillips as one of the prisoners.

TS is a very Martial movie, with good battle sequences, weapons and lots of soldier, "yes sir," "we're behind you, sir" stuff. Pro-military.

Silliness is present for those squids looking for it, but any movie dealing with time travel is ridiculous, inevitably.

Politics/Message:

Small, non-intrusive government. Power corrupts and power sure as heck went to Skynet's head. Wait until it gets it's circuits on our medical records.

TS takes the easy way out by saying that humans are different because we have "heart." The heart, as you know, is a biological machine. What separates us is that we are made in God's image and thus have a soul.

The Skynet prison is obviously a criticism of the conditions at Guantanamo.

Terminator - The Sarah Connor Chronicles - The Complete First Season

Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles - The Complete Second Season

Terminator 2 Judgement Day, Terminator 3 Rise of the Machines : Arnold 2 Pack Collection

The Terminator (Special Edition)

Cast and credits below:

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Tags: "terminator 4", "terminator four", terminater

Previous comments here.

21. Overall, another good season. The ending was somewhat predictable. The loyalty changes were enough to give one whiplash. I'm glad it stopped where it did or else we'd have to see Tony switch again.

22. My final comment on Tony and the human-wart, Garafalo: There was a point where Almeida was about to turn around. "Oh no! He's going to 'act,'" I thought. Garafalo no doubt thinks that she added balance to a right-wing show. She did in a way, as none of the other character made me nauseous upon scene entrance.

23. I'd need more information to make a philosophical determination, but in his deathbed advice to Renee Walker, Bauer seemed to be saying that subduing emotion to serve a higher social good, in this case a Kantian, "what if everybody in the world wanted to be a kick-butt secret anti-terrorism expert?" is worthwhile even if impossible for him personally.

As far as Gygaxian philosophy, Bauer is definitely Neutral Good.

Dungeon Master's Guide: Essential Reference Information for Gamemastering Advanced D& D by Gary Gygax

24. I liked the cross-cultural praying scene with the Muslim Imam(?). It emphasized his D and D alignment choice (above). Were he Lawful Good, he'd have insisted on a representative of his own religion.

24.1. What the heck was the Mountain Dew commercial about? **update** It was a contest. Some dude named Lauritsen won. It's not on Youtube yet. Keep checking here.

24.2. I do like the Ford Fusion Hybrid. When Obama gives me one, I'll gladly take it.

24.3. The sci-fi connections were fun this year. At first I thought Olivia Taylor, Sprague Grayden, was the pregnant brothel girl in Firefly, but I was wrong. Dr. Carson Beckett (Paul McGillion), of Stargate Atlantis (moment of silence) was in it. It's the second appearance by a Stargate cast member. Dr. Daniel Jackson (Michael Shanks) was a sort of spy-gigolo a couple of seasons back.

24.4. My wife and I decided that Kim Bauer's skin has taken a turn for the worse and that she's a little heavier than before. As I'm Cuban, I welcome her noticeably larger butt. Maybe she can try out for Nuestra Belleza Latina next year.

24: Season Seven

Stargate Atlantis: The Complete Fifth Season

Firefly - The Complete Series

Stargate SG-1: The Complete Series Collection

Hmmm...according to the 1420 codex, Mumbodius Jumbodatum, there should be a small symbol under this chair. There. OK. This is the Renaissance symbol for "Angel." I can tell because it looks just like what a 21st century movie-goer would expect such a symbol to look like. Where's there a place in Rome associated with Angels? Let's look at this map. Angels have halos. Draw a circle here where we're at to the location of the last murder. No, halos only look elliptical- they're really circles. Aha! There's a Church right here along the halo's path, St. Incrdula. (two-minute drive) The Angel's in the middle here. Let's see: hands, feet, right there! The nose is aimed at that cellar. But wait, Donatello, the maker of the statue was dyslexic so it really should be that wall on the other side. The plaster's falling off. Let's dig right here in front of all of these museum patrons. Drat! Nothing here. Wait! A key. Look for a door. Good. Right here. A book! Let me thumb through it for a moment. This is the symbol the 17th century monk, Paolo Bergonini's used as a quiet protest against the Church's treatment of Galileo. Let me put it under this light. It matches the symbol on your ring. You, sir, are a murderer.

In it's complete absurdity, Angels and Demons resembles the National Treasure movies. The quick finding of clues, so impossibly miraculous that even the Church would balk. The incredible store of knowledge within one man's head-- Robert Langdon knows more about the Vatican than the Vatican itself. It's all very silly.

National Treasure (Two-Disc Collector's Edition)

National Treasure 2 - Book of Secrets (Two-Disc Collector's Edition)

It's also very fun. The movie moves quickly. The editing is sharp. There's a rather great scene in which Langdon and some German Vatican flunky are trapped in an air-tight book room.

You don't have to be a symbologist to guess the surprise ending, although since one doubts whether modern writers would take such an obvious path, it has the same effect as a true surprise ending. Tom Hanks remains America's most charismatic actor. Ewan McGregor does very well here. He's good with religious stuff, first with Forceism and now, Catholicism.

Star Wars Prequel Trilogy

The scenery is wonderful and I can totally see myself doing an "Angels and Demons tour" of Italy.

A Cuban flag appeared within the crowd in more than a few scenes. I wonder which official of the Cuba's atheist government let that dude go to a Papal Conclave.

The main difference between National Treasure and Angels and Demons is that the latter deals with religion. This fact makes Angels and Demons a league deeper and at least as interesting (other people find the subject interesting, according to this week's box office).

Is Angels and Demons anti-Catholic?

Yes and No.

If you wanted to make the most anti-Catholic movie in the universe, you'd make a mocking comedy like Religulous. For non-comedies, you'd either portray the Church as an institution filled with depraved nuts like In the Name of the Rose or as some grand conspiracy as in DaVinci Code.

The Da Vinci Code (Widescreen Two-Disc Special Edition)

The Name of the Rose

There are elements of the above in Angels and Demons: Langdon makes fun of one pope's phallophobia (immediately after, Langdon denies bias). The Catholics in the movie are sincere, however, and not insane. Angels and Demons doesn't attack the Church's foundation, Christ, like the DaVinci Code does (answer tract here).

The movie takes Christianity seriously and even Langdon is ambiguous about his own faith stance. Antimatter may or may not prove the existence of God.

What's absolutely sinful about Angels and Demons is that its lies may lead people astray.

It's a near iron-clad truth that people who attack Christianity in general and the Catholic Church specifically must lie to make a dramatic point. Angels and Demons lies about the Illuminati's relationship with the Church. Galileo lived in the 17th century, a full 150 years before the foundation of the Illuminati. There was never a purge of the Illuminati by the Church ("purga", in the movie).

I don't think the Church condemned Shakespeare, Chaucer, or the English language.

More of a misunderstanding than a lie is Angels and Demons' insistence on some kind of Christian-Science split. In fact, many Churchmen were scientists: Mendel, Copernicus (who developed the heliocentric theory before Galileo), and the originator of the Big Bang theory, Georges Lemaître. The Catholic Church has never condemned evolution (here and here). It only claims to deal authoritatively with faith and morals.

That Dan Brown has to lie about Galileo's connection with the Illuminati proves that Brown's central thesis is flawed. Why didn't Brown use a condemned scientist contemporary with the Illuminati? Because he couldn't find one. Galileo's the only famous example of Church persecution of science (and even that is distorted).

Perhaps a disclaimer at the end of the film explaining that a lot of this is made up would have given Ron Howard an out with God.

On the other hand, movies like Angels and Demons cause interest in religion and that's probably a good thing. Ron Howard may yet make it.

Cast and credits below:

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Part one.

Part two, here.

Not much time now. I gotta finish this list.

11. Did Elisha Cuthbert get...less attractive? Here are some earlier pictures:

And recently, in 24.

I checked for mitigating factors and could find none. Ms. Cuthbert hasn't had a child (in which case she'd easily make up for it with a deeper kind of beauty). The pictures aren't from some TMZ commando raid. I assume Elisha had some make up help on the set. Even the clothes are very concealing.

I still find her a charismatic actress. I just thought I'd bring this to your attention.

12. And, I still hope they rescue her.

13. Tony Almeida remains an almost comically poor actor. My wife and I laugh whenever he's on-camera.

14. I thought the Chloe-Janis Gold (Jeanine Garofalo) tech showdown was interesting. Of course, I rooted for Chloe, as I'm a sane man and find Garofalo to be a huge pimple on this show's behind.

15. The plot is nearing ridiculousness. It's changes bad guys almost every week. I half-expect Jack Bauer to reveal himself a "Manchurian candidate" and Tony to capture him after explaining how he (Tony) was in super-duper deep undercover.

16. The show has been somewhat ambiguous on the torture issue, although I think it's still pro-interrogation.

17. I say this because Jack Bauer always gets results.

18. Ms. Gold (I assume. Who'd marry her?) is portrayed as a foolishly scrupulous torture prude.

19. I like the Chief of staff daughter sub-plot.

20. Olivia Taylor's press contact showed the lengths he's willing to go to get a story, sleeping with another guy- the practical side of gay sex.

Tags: "did elisha cuthbert get ugly", "elisha cutthbert ugly", chloe

Let me get the most troublesome aspects of Star Trek out of the way first:

1. If you remember the original series (TOS), Chekov is a young rookie out of the academy, and one gets the feeling that McCoy and Sulu are of different ages. Captain Pike is barely a little older than Captain Kirk.

In this Star Trek, everybody's about 24, except for Pike who's pushing 55. It's ridiculous.

2. Uhura's character creates massive illogic hurdles. Why is she a lieutenant in TOS and Kirk a captain, a full three grades and 15 years of career higher, if they went to school at the same time? Did Uhura get busted? Are there still remnants of racial prejudice in the future? And, she's from Africa. In the future, do all Africans speak English with a New Jersey accent? I know, but the original Uhura speaks with the careful diction of an English learner.

3. There's the complete impossibility of the whole situation: One ship comes to invade earth and they already have to call in the reserves, from the academy(!)? I don't think that's happened since Southerners left West Point to fight for the Confederacy. Note to Starfleet: increase recruiting budget.

When those cadets get on board the ship, they take over the most important jobs. Was the rest of the crew that awful?

4. I originally thought that what happens to Spock's mom in this Star Trek represents a huge continuity problem, as well as the fact that it's clearly stated in TOS episode "Balance of Terror," that the Federation had never encountered the Romulans; but then I realized that things in Star Trek happen in a different reality (Spock, in his dotage, failed to save the Romulan world from a super nova) so it's OK.

As to the movie itself, only hard-core Trekkies and sticklers for movies making lots of sense will find Star Trek offensive.

In fact, inoffensiveness is Star Trek's greatest attribute.

Gone are the original series' social commentary and psychological themes, a groundbreaking attribute of TOS which I realize becomes somewhat tiresome by its third season. Thus, this Star Trek has no evil corporations, exploitation of alien races, unenlightened war mongers, environmental destruction. There isn't any search for ultimate meaning or any human self-reflection at all. Nobody must "learn to live together." It's a clear good-evil fight. Everything seems right with Starfleet and the future world except for some bitter Romulans.

Plot: Aliens come to destroy the world. Out of control boy finds his true calling. Logical dude learns to let go. That's it. Pretty simple, huh? Nope. There's time travel. Time travel is a heavy sci-fi weapon to wield and one should do so with caution and only in an emergency. Does wanting to create a new series with the original characters, but sans Roddenberrian baggage, qualify? Perhaps.

I found the story boring, but some didn't, judging from the reviews.

The characters are uncomplicated and likable. They're not exactly funny- a lot of the jokes are just allusions to TOS, a common tactic when remaking beloved and quirky TV series; Scooby Doo does the same thing- but they're enthusiastic and easy to watch especially Uhura who rivals her predecessor in ebon hotness.

There it is, then. For better or worse: brisk, not quite MTV, unintellectual, and "fun."

Errata:

They couldn't have made William Shatner a bartender or something?

The Starfleet dress code hasn't changed. That means we still have completely impractical, but morale-boosting mini-skirts.

Politics/Message:

We haven't seen an unrepentant Flint/James Bond-style skirt-chasing bad-boy heterosexual male chauvinist (Starbuck from BSG doesn't count as she may be a girl) in such a long time that James T. Kirk is kind of refreshing.

George "Papa" Kirk is lauded for doing his duty. You can see good bit of dialog on it in the trailer above.

This is the least political Star Trek since "Trouble with Tribbles." They don't try to make any "inevitability arguments" by presenting current cultural issues as long-ago settled examples of past cultural silliness, as TOS does with racism and international conflict, for example. We don't see Sulu marry a guy, for example, even though we know he wants to.

Scooby-Doo (Widescreen Edition)

Star Trek: The Original Series (Remastered) - Three Season Pack

Star Trek Movie Set (The Motion Picture/ The Wrath of Khan/ The Search for Spock/ The Voyage Home/ The Final Frontier/ The Undiscovered Country/ Generations/ First Contact/ Insurrection/ Nemesis)

Cast and Crew below.

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Tags: "gay marriage", "star trek sex", same-sex"

Another week, another comic book movie.

When I was a kid and watched superhero shows on television, I was always most interested in the "origin" episodes because I liked history and enjoyed thinking about why things were the way they were ("papi, why do people buy those ugly cars?" "That, son, is America at its best. I'd like to see the Japanese make a T-bird").

So, I entered the Krikorian X-Men Origins: Wolverine with more built-in enthusiasm than I had for the previous X-Men movies, where the characters pretty much come fully-formed, as they would have to seeing as how X-Men isn't an organic superhero group like the Fantastic 4, but an all-star team.

As a historical document, Wolverine doesn't disappoint. In fact, it made me realize how profoundly ignorant I was about things Wolverine. I must have said, "Oh, so that's why..." a dozen times (conversing with oneself out-loud, inside of a crowded theater is a sign of mental health). It turns out that Wolverine's a mutant's mutant. Like many of today's Hollywood starlets and some beauty queens, Wolverine feels the need to "enhance" his natural gifts: Wolverine is born with extra bones that protrude from his hands, super strength, and near-miraculous healing powers. To this already impressive array, the government adds an adamantium skeleton, which makes him that much better.

Something else that makes Wolverine an appealing movie is that Wolverine himself is by far the most dramatically compelling (Halle Berry's Storm has her charms) X-Man. His super-powers are closer to Batman-Spiderman "realistic" than Superman fantastic. One can understand Wolverine's powers, unlike those of Gambit, a superhero concept that makes no sense to me. Wolverine isn't Hulk-like unstoppable either and his vulnerabilities are interesting: One can sneak up on him, chop off his head off with any of the adamantium shovels available at Home Depot, and be done with him.

Wolverine starts in the early 19th century with Wolverine and his super brother running away from home and then we see a montage where the brothers take part in every American war since the Civil War. A secret government group recruits Wolverine and his brother into a super commando group, Team X. After a fairly spectacular assault on a strong man's compound, Wolverine leaves the group because of some nasty treatment of African civilians. Wolverine's brother is then involved in a series of mutant killings and Wolverine must stop him and the people behind the mutant hate crimes. He falls in love, too.

Good stuff:

Some very clever superheroes and the effects that go along with them. I like the super-fast blade guy, the pistol dude, and the teleporting black cowboy. One girl has the ability to influence men through touch (actually, almost all women have this ability) and her sister is "solid as a rock."

Overall:

Wolverine lacks the semi-profundity of Dark Knight and Iron Man, and the closest it comes to Spiderman's sense of fun is some bathroom humor (literally), but it's good. I feel confident in saying that if you liked X-Men, you'll like Wolverine.

Politics/Message:

Wolverine has a mild anti-government message, which suits me fine at this point in history. We see, for example, the disaster that can result from government-run health care, "I just wanted my tonsils out and they gave me an indestructible metal skeleton. This wouldn't happen at Kaiser." Like in real life, Wolverine has to leave Canada to get timely medical care (imagine the savings if we can isolate the "healing factor" gene. It'd be better than banning trans-fats). Wolverine can't get any nasty government atrocity work in Canada either. Conclusion: Canada is not the place to be a budding superhero or evil government operative.

All of the X-Men-derived movies have a strong "noble social outcast"/anti-prejudice theme, "We needn't fear people with huge claws that can tear open a tank, nor those who can manipulate the weather or control magnetism. If we took some time to get to know them, we'd see that they're just like us (except for the aforementioned potential to cause mass destruction with the wave of an adamantium-cored finger).**

Many people associate the X-Men themes with the current controversies over homosexual stuff in society. The Charles Xavier would definitely disapprove of a society that shuns Christian beauty contestants just for expressing the idea that society should prefer opposite-sex marriage.

**No, I'm not saying all mutants are dangerous. Some of my best friends resemble Nightcrawler.

Iron Man (Single-Disc Edition)

X-Men Trilogy (X-Men/ X2 - X-Men United/ X-Men - The Last Stand)

Spider-Man - The Motion Picture DVD Trilogy (Spider-Man / Spider-Man 2 / Spider-Man 3)

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Tags: adimantium